I thought something was coming up today.
Do you know how?
Because I had a headache (I worked too late last night), but I started tidying my desk…
Anyone who knows me knows I could carbon date some stuff on there (no dead things that were once alive are ever found on my desk, promised). I only have a clear out every few months. Basically when I start to resent the pile on the left and the pile on the right, I start stacking things in the middle, and that gets in the way of my keyboard and my many notebooks, at which point I throw a silent wobbly and I clear the entire desk.
Obviously, this is preferably when have a full to do list, one of the cats is sick, a kid needs some paperwork for school, or the pile of single socks on the sofa has reached a critical level.
Hey, procrastination is a way to manage stress, so no judging.
So I started clearing my desk, found some papers I had been thinking about looking for for a couple of weeks, and obviously stopped halfway, because it was necessary at that point for me to check out my THREE whiteboards.
The same THREE whiteboards I haven’t touched for two and a half years and barely looked at for six months, because it felt like nothing was moving anyway.
Indeed, the THREE whiteboards which had been manifestos to how little I had achieved in comparison to my many ideas and wants, since I started my life reboot.
Well, you know what?
I immediately started feeling better.
It wasn’t so much the desk. It was the fact that some of the things (that wouldn’t rub off because they had been there for so long), had actually been DONE, or DITCHED!
Imagine my surpriiiiise!! I had things to rub off!! ( Actually I needed some lemon essential oil for that).
And it felt GOOD. And I wrote my wins in my book -not this one, that one, yeah the blue one, no, the other blue one-.
I was FINALLY, today, able to appreciate how far I had come in so many respects.
Now, why am I telling you this?
Because I sucked at checking how far I’d got, I had life stuck to my face and I couldn’t take a step back, receive, or acknowledge.
And believe me, for someone who happily gives all the time, that was low-grade-but-always-there-stressful and there is no reason why you should put yourself through this too.